Oiesis: The Deception

“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
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The One Thing They Won’t Forget

There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Read More

The Joy and Pain of Being Human

Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
Read More

Something Even Better!

The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…
Read More

Two Things Jehovah’s Witnesses Taught Me Without Saying A Word

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

Read More
“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

Oiesis: The Deception

“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
Read More

The One Thing They Won’t Forget

There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Read More

The Joy and Pain of Being Human

Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
Read More

Something Even Better!

The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…
Read More

Two Things Jehovah’s Witnesses Taught Me Without Saying A Word

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

Read More

Oiesis: The Deception

“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
Read More

The One Thing They Won’t Forget

There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Read More

The Joy and Pain of Being Human

Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
Read More

Something Even Better!

The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…
Read More

Two Things Jehovah’s Witnesses Taught Me Without Saying A Word

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

Read More

Oiesis: The Deception

“When you are told from childhood that you are expected and commanded to behave in a way that will be acceptable only if you do it voluntarily... you remain permanently mixed-up. That, if anything, is permanent brain damage...” - Alan Watts I knew I would need to take a good, long and honest look at myself. Others had defined me to that point. I had assumed a role put upon me by someone else–by my parents and by the Jehovah's Witness community. They had told me who I was to be.  I had allowed this as it was the only way I knew. That is how life must be. Now, that role was…
Read More

The One Thing They Won’t Forget

There are some experiences in life that just stick with you. One of mine came courtesy of Victor, my friend VJ's dad, who had become something of a father figure to me. One morning when we were out early morning preaching to people on the streets (we were Jehovah's Witnesses), Victor decided it was a good time to teach me, my friend Danny, and his two boys VJ and Paul a life lesson. He waved us over enthusiastically and said "Hey, I want to show you guys something. But before I do, think about this. What's the most precious thing you have?" Victor was good at making us think about…
Read More

The Joy and Pain of Being Human

Imagine a life filled with close friends, a happy family and purpose. Sounds ideal right? For over four decades I lived right there. Or more appropriately, attempted to live. For me, it was more "idealistic" than ideal. Add a dash of secret sin and deceit to the above imagery and you begin to see how the ideal can quickly devolve into the façade. The proverbial double life. Not the type of living one naturally aspires to. Joy to Pain At the ripe old age of 10, I became a baptized Jehovah’s Witness. Those were the best of days as the saying goes. Indeed they were. After all, I was a…
Read More

Something Even Better!

The thought didn't occur to me until the question was asked. The feelings were there. And the subconscious acknowledgement I was now in a better place emotionally and spiritually. I just hadn’t articulated it in my head until that moment. It was the dreaded conversation I imagine every child hates to have with a parent. The conversation wherein the child tells the parent what they least want to hear — that they’re doing something completely contrary to what was hoped for. Thing is in my situation, I’m not just a child anymore. I’m a grown-ass man speaking as a son to a father. The twist in my story is I grew up…
Read More

Two Things Jehovah’s Witnesses Taught Me Without Saying A Word

When you screw up you need to straighten things out. The sooner the better of course but you do what you can. So, with a desire to please God and right the wrong I went to my spiritual leaders and confessed to them all of my transgressions from age 7 to the present. That was probably TMI for them but I wanted the cleanest slate possible. I spilt the beans on everything I felt even hinted at sin since I thought it would help.

Read More

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